Hope.
It’s a powerful thing. Hope can get us out of bed in the morning. Hope can push us past exhaustion for one more try, or one more box unpacked, one more hour worked. One more lap around the room with the squalling infant. One more day lived.
We live on Hope. Some of us more than others – for some of us, Hope is all we have. Hope is what drives each breath. Hope is what keeps our hearts beating. I am lucky. My family is lucky. We don’t have to live only on Hope. We have so much.
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I never realized that our previous apartment was such a great source of stress and frustration. Funny how a bit of distance, a bit of perspective, can show things so clearly. Our new apartment is wonderful. Perfect, for us. When we walked in that first day, with a load of our precious personal belongings, I felt something. I felt uplifted. I felt brighter. I felt cleaner. I felt more relaxed, despite the stress of a family move. I felt Hope. It made it easier to unpack. It made it possible to stay up past midnight most nights sorting through boxes and bags.
No longer does my daughter wake up at night screaming because the assholes above us are stomping, yelling, dragging, dancing, piano-playing and vaccuuming above her head at all hours of the night.
No longer do I have to lug my children and the groceries and the diaper bags and my laptop and the various miscellaneous crap that seems to follow us like a messy dark cloud through two heavy doors before getting to our apartment door.
No longer do I feel as though the space in our apartment is ill used, ill planned and basically – a total waste of money.
No longer do I feel as though I am drowing in toys and crap and ohmygodIhavenoplacetowalk because we have huge closets but no living space.
It’s wonderful.
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I realize these are petty complaints and subtle differences. I do. There are many folks dealing with much heavier burdens than mine. But home is a haven, a safe place, a place to relax. Our old apartment had become something of a burden but now, despite all the boxes and the unpacked but not quite put away stuff that we have laying around, I am happy to come home.
This made me smile
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MommyGeek Reply:
June 4th, 2009 at 1:31 PM
@Miss Grace, that is awesome. I love smiles.
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Very true. I love the hope that comes with a new place. I’m looking forward to moving next year for that very reason. Good luck with the rest of the putting away of stuff.
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MommyGeek Reply:
June 4th, 2009 at 1:33 PM
@Kat, thank you ma’am. I shall put away our crap to the best of my (limited) ability. Are you moving a long distance next year? Good luck!
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Kat Reply:
June 4th, 2009 at 1:46 PM
@MommyGeek, We’re hoping to get orders to go overseas. “Fingers crossed!” If that doesn’t happen we’ll just be happy to leave our current area. No matter what happens we’re moving out of our current neighborhood. I will not miss our postage stamp size yard and inability to go for walks and feel safe.
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MommyGeek Reply:
June 4th, 2009 at 3:17 PM
@Kat, ooooh good luck! Going overseas sounds so exciting (and scary). That move will be a doozy… but at least the military pays for it, right?
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Good for you. The space you live in affects so much of your life so I’m glad you’ve got a good one now.
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MommyGeek Reply:
June 4th, 2009 at 1:32 PM
@But Why Mommy, at least for a year! Who knows where next year will take us….. we might be moving to Texas! (and then we start all over again. sigh.)
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That’s awesome – and important. Glad you’ve found a place that feels like home.
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MommyGeek Reply:
June 4th, 2009 at 1:32 PM
@anymommy, me too. It sure does make it easier to come home and deal with the whole bedtime/dinner saga.
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I’m a little late on my comments this week but a broken computer will do that do a person!
Still I’m taking it in stride or at least trying to right?!
I love my home! Not because it is clean or perfect. In fact it is often messy and has a variety of projects half done everywhere. But it is always comfortable and it is always comforting. So I’m very glad that you are feeling happy about your new place!
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MommyGeek Reply:
June 30th, 2009 at 9:53 AM
@MamaB, I’m even later. See? It’s not all bad. lol.
Feeling very, very happy. Thank you. And I hope your computer is fixed now!
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